Dying to be Skinny

I want to start this blog post by sharing a secret with you.  I had an eating disorder called Bulimia.  It started my senior year of high school.  I started abusing laxatives until I got down to a size zero.  I'm sharing this because I know I'm not alone.  In an age of Cosmo and Vogue, airbrushing, and photo shop, it's really hard for young women to accept their bodies and celebrate each and every unique and beautiful figure.  On that note, I was always bullied for my figure.  I'm very curvy with a big round butt.  And, this was pre-JL era, so big butts were not in fad at the time.  I played softball and wore very tight form fitting uniforms.  Bulimia was a way for me to erase myself.

My mom almost immediately caught on when I started wasting away to nothing.  And, not to get too graphic, but there is a distinct odor when someone is abusing laxatives.  It's almost a chemical/soapy smell.  I remember she got really mad!  One day I got lightheaded in the main stairway of my high school and collapsed, requiring a trip to the hospital.  My family always used "tough love" on me.  Mom explained that if I kept on abusing my body I could end up with a colostomy bag, or worse, my heart could stop and I could die.  And, that talk did it for me.  I put down the laxatives and never used them again.  

Today, I have a very healthy relationship with food - except for that time I went vegan, but instead of eating "clean," I ate a lot of processed foods and became overweight.  Now I celebrate my curves.  Instead of looking for fashion inspiration in magazines, I tend to look at blogs of curvy women.  It inspires me to be different in my fashion and not try to wear things that were only meant for models.  I work out, not to look skinny, but to look like I could kick some butt.  

But...

Not all girls are that lucky.  This blog is dedicated to Terri Schiavo.  Have you ever heard of her?  Born December 3, 1963, Terri struggled with obesity most of her childhood, weighing up to 250 pounds.  She eventually lost around 100 pounds before attending Bucks County Community College.  There, Terri met her husband, Michael Schiavo in 1982.  They wed November 10, 1984 and moved to Florida to be closer to Terri's family.

On February 25, 1990, at the young age of 26, Terri suffered a cardiac arrest.  How did an otherwise perfectly healthy 26-year-old woman go into cardiac arrest?  Her chart showed that she "apparently had been trying to keep her weight down with dieting by herself, drinking liquids most of the time during the day and drinking about 10-15 glasses of iced tea."  She suffered a severe electrolyte imbalance and dangerously abnormally low potassium levels called hypokalemia.  Why are low potassium levels so dangerous?  They can cause heart rhythm problems up to "sudden arrhythmia death syndrome."  Basically, Terri had been starving herself to death, blocking her body of healthy nutrients it needed to function.

Although Terri was successful resuscitated, she sustained severe brain damage caused by oxygen deprivation to her brain.  She went in to a coma and was diagnosed as being in an "irreversible persistent vegetative state."  Roughly two and a half months passed and there was no improvement to her condition.  Her husband tried several different therapies, including experimental therapies to include: Occupational, Speech, Physical, etc.

In 1998, eight years after her coma, Micheal petitioned the Sixth Circuit Court of Florida to remove her tube.  When married, your spouse is your legal guardian, so Micheal was within his rights.  Michael persistently advocated that his wife would not wish to live in a vegetative state.  A lot of people found him a cruel and uncaring husband for wanting to remove Terri's feeding tube, including Terri's parents. Robert and Mary Schindler again vehemently opposed. Most parents would, right?

On April 24, 2001, Terri's feeding tube was removed.  It made front page news and all the networks were covering it.  However, the feeding tube was put back in only days later.  Again, on February 25, 2005, a Judge in Pinellas County Florida granted the removal.  Terri's parents and lawyers appealed to the Federal government for intervention.  Finally, on March 18, 2005, while Terri was in hospice, the tube was disconnected for the final time.  Terri died thirteen days later on March 31, 2005.

However, what the media, I believe, failed to convey was that Terri had been in this vegetative state from 1990-2005, FIFTEEN YEARS!

Despite her husbands desire to end Terri's life, her parents fought for continued artificial nutrition/hydration.  Thus, a long legal battle ensured that involved both state and federal courts, even escalating all the way up to the POTUS (George Bush, at the time).  The legal tape created a seven year delay.

Terri passed away on March 31, 2005.  She had been in a vegetative state for fifteen years before leaving this world.  I visited her grave site.  After having trouble finding it, we called the Cemetery staff and they told us that the family did not wish to disclose the location.  However, after scouring the area, we finally found the spot.  Next to a beautiful pond and fountain.

As I stood there, I wondered where this woman would be today.  What would she have accomplished? She would have been 56 years old.  If Terri could speak from the grave, what would she say?

I would like to think maybe she'd say the following:

It's important to draft a living will and discuss it with your legal guardian so your family knows what to do in the event of a coma or a vegetative state.  

You're beautiful just the way you are, so please value your health.  And, if you're currently battling obesity and on a journey to weight loss, please make a path of lifestyle changes and lose your weight in a healthy way.