Psychiatry Gone Nuts

I'm going to start off this blog post with a joke, because we could all use a laugh:

A naked guy wraps himself in Saran Wrap and walks into a psychiatrist's office.  He goes in to the see the psychiatrist and the doctor looks at him and says: "I can clearly see your nuts" ["...you're nuts"].

Now you may be laughing right now.  But, one of the funniest things ever was when my Granny would tell this joke.  And, at the end she would say: "I can clearly see your BALLS!"  I miss my Granny so much!

Now to the meat of the matter, so to speak...

Last year I went through something pretty traumatic.  It cut so deeply at the time, I really didn't know who I could talk to about it.  And, to top it all off, it was embarrassing and humiliating.  At the time, I was attending a Bible study class in Simpsonville, SC.  The group leader could see I was deeply sad.  She invited me to lunch and I just opened up to her about everything I had experienced.  She suggested that I go talk to a professional about the matter.  And, she gave me the name and number of a counselor who had also helped her son.

I called and set up an appointment.  It wasn't the first time I had gone to speak to someone about my life.  I remember back in college when I went through a breakup.  It was pretty traumatic for me, because I left after the abuse.  Yet, I still couldn't find closure.  After one session with the counselor, I realized I was wasting my life being sad over an abuser...a manipulator.  Furthermore, I realized that prior relationship taught be things early on that would stick with me through the rest of my life and serve me well.

Anyways, back to last year...

So, I set up an appointment with this male counselor.  I showed up to the appointment.  I sat on his sofa.  He, right off the bat, promoted his book to me.  Feeling obligated, I pulled out my checkbook and purchased a copy of the book.  I remember him having a HUGE Bible sitting on the coffee table and maybe that's why I felt so trusting.  I opened up and told him about everything that had occurred.  I cried, pretty hard.  And, he took one of my Kleenexes soaked in my tears, and he put it up on his book shelf and told me that he was going to keep it as a memento of me...and that one day I would be the CEO of a large company and he would have my tears I cried over something silly.  At the time I thought that was really sweet and it didn't raise any flags.

Having not been through a lot of therapy in my life, I didn't really know what was normal and what was kinda "off."  So, he started texting me.  He would send morning texts from time to time encouraging me to have a great day.  He would start them by saying: "Good morning, Princess!"  Then, one day, he invited me to Long John Silver's to meet him and his wife.  He said that I reminded him so much of his second wife.  So I agreed to meet them there.  On a side note, I have no idea how Captain D's and Long John Silver's even stay in business.  Their parking lots are always empty.  They collectively reminded me of the Billy Chrystal old couple from "Princess Bride."  His wife started telling me all her wild youthful stories and how she met Bono on a flight and a few naughty tales.  Then they looked at each other, and promise on my life, they said, "You're like the child we never had."  Talk about tingles shooting down my arm.

Yet, I agreed to meet him again.  And, this time, during the appointment time his entire focus was on my father.  I never mentioned my dad, but he kept insisting we talk about him.  And, then he goes down this path of trying to make me see my dad in a dark light.  That's a form on control and brainwashing to separate you from your emotional support system.  Luckily, from past experience, I was able to feel my gut on that.  I ended the session and I explained that I would contact him if I wanted to schedule again.

For the next weeks he persistently texted me.  In the mornings, afternoons, evenings.  It became almost obsessive.  I even told him I had gone to see my family and he replied: "Are you going to see them out of gratitude or guilt/fear?"  Like, I dunno about you but I could kinda go without a third party psycho-analysis of my every move.

I texted the Doctor that I would no longer be needing his services.  He followed by a another psychobabble question, indubitably, trying to hook me back in.  In cases of manipulation, I find it best that instead of politely reforming your response, to just keep saying the same thing until it's like a broken record.  "Again, I will no longer be needing your services."  And, almost as if to manipulate one last time, he said, "I'll be praying for you."  And, I replied: "For the third and I really hope the final time, I will no longer be needing your services."

He never contacted me again.  And, I've never been back to therapy again.  But, with that said, I know I have a network of people to call that will tell me the God's honest truth if I ask for help.  And, for that I'm truly grateful.  Am, I slamming counseling or coaching?  Absolutely not!!!  These people are supposedly "healers" and should maintain a clear professional boundary. I felt this doctor crossed so many...like Stevie Wonder driving.  

The author's purpose: Just be vigilant!  If you do seek therapy, do your due diligence to determine their background and reputation/client reviews.  Just because they helped someone's son does not mean they can help you!  He has my DNA on that tissue and I'm worried about it.  And also, paraphrasing here: "life is the toughest teacher, it'll get you the test and the lesson later."  So really, the lesson is what we pay people for, right?  

Thanks for reading and have a lovely night!