Head Over Heels
https://youtu.be/CsHiG-43Fzg?si=Kj8x3zrcPeFFSjIs
(Head Over Heels, Tears for Fears)
80s music was some of the best ever, no?
Well, hello, and welcome back!
In an interesting turn of events, the state of Arizona, originally announcing that it would take WEEKS to count the final tally of votes for POTUS has now come back with a clear winner (Trump). I'm assuming Arizona immediately realized the landslide win in both electoral and popular vote; thus, they were no longer "the deciding" or "hold out" vote (and didn't have to fraudulently harvest ballots, which takes a few weeks to engineer.) However, Arizona's senate seat race is still ongoing with a recount. Why is it that when we were kids, we would find out the election results in every single state for the Presidential race before we went to bed, and now it's taking Maricopa County weeks to count its ballots? Something is off, and we can't argue that.
You know another thing Arizona doesn't do so well, besides counting votes? Public Executions. Here's a name I bet you didn't learn in public school...Eva Dugan.
Eva Dugan, a housekeeper, was married five times, and every single one of her five husbands mysteriously died or went missing. It wasn't under her boss, a rich rancher (chicken farmer) who had disappeared seemingly off the face of the earth, was suddenly found buried 11 months later. She finally admitted she killed him after he complained about her cooking. She clearly didn't like her cooking chastised. Guys, are you listening?
Eva Dugan, quite possibly a serial killer (if she, indeed, killed all her husbands) was finally charged with capital murder and sentenced to hanging, which was the preferred death penalty sentence in Arizona at the time. Standing stoically at the gallows in Florence, Arizona on February 21, 1930, she told the guards to not "hold my arms so tight the people will think I am afraid." Soon after the trap door to the gallows sprung, Dugan fell so hard to the end of the line that it decapitated her head. The severed head of Eva rolled within a few feet of the spectators causing immense screaming - three men and two women fainted. And I'm sure someone on the production team that didn't "carry the one" in that math error probably murmured, "Well, fuck, that wasn't supposed to happen." But that's just a guess. Maybe, the scales were broken, and like most women, she lied about her weight. Meanwhile her blood kept pumping out like a volcano eruption for a couple of minutes where her head used to be.
What was supposed to be a nice family outing to view a public hanging turned into the fuel of nightmares. Public hangings ceased immediately in Arizona that day after the botched execution of Eva Dugan. It's like that one really fun toy (like the lawn darts, for example) that got banned because of one stupid dead kid. Sorry for the irreverence but I'm really trying to drive home an important analogy of the absolute buzz kill of discontinuing the highlight of Arizonan's lives in the 1930's - before Sonic slushies, crystal meth, and cruising the strip.
Arizona, you have a gorgeous state, but you need to get your shit together! Maybe you should quit while you're a head. Okay, okay, I'll stop now.
Signed,
Colorado Kimmie

Comments
Post a Comment